Aunt T is helping to sell grandpa's van to his friend that used to take care of him. I just need to have my signature notarized and make sure that Simpson (attorney) has the Power of Attorney recorded at the court house. Aunt T had a much easier way to do it, but I failed to pick up on it. Oh well, it still gets done.
Then I called Keegan (attorney) to see if he has spoken to Grandpa face to face. He said he had not been able to yet, but Grandpa's wife had been served and provided a written response. Keegan did not tell me what she stated, but I know she did not agree to the divorce. Mr. Keegan said it would mean going to court in order to have it done. I explained to him that Grandpa's wife already knows that. That is why she responded in writing. No one is willing to take this to court and she knows that. So Mr. Keegan stated that he would go talk to Grandpa on Monday at 10:00 AM.
Then I called Grandpa to let him know his attorney would come talk to him on Monday. Grandpa doesn't know what to do. Right now his wife is being very sweet and kind to him and he said he has nothing against her. I told him that his attorney would discuss why he might want a divorce and why he might want to stay married. Then Grandpa would have to make the decision.
Then he started talking about selling his trailer to Mary. I told him that was not going to happen, but he repeatedly said there is no reason not to. He told me Aunt T said she would sell it to Mary if she had the money. I told him that was not true. Aunt T will not sell to Mary, we had already discussed it. He said, " don't tell me what she said, I'll tell you what she said. She said if Mary had the money, she would sell the trailer to her!"
At one point, I asked him to stop yelling at me. He didn't think he was yelling, or arguing. Eventually he got me mixed up with Aunt T. I told him he was talking to Karen. He said "you need to tell me that, you two sound too much alike." I asked him if it made any difference who he was talking to and he said, "well, yeah it does!"
I tried to make small talk like asking what he was watching on TV. I asked if he and Mary were going out to dinner tonight and he said no, but they might on Saturday if it doesn't snow too much. Then we talked about how nice it was today.The conversation then returned to his marriage. He asked me what I wanted him to do, "get a divorce so you can have things your way?"
Then I called Keegan (attorney) to see if he has spoken to Grandpa face to face. He said he had not been able to yet, but Grandpa's wife had been served and provided a written response. Keegan did not tell me what she stated, but I know she did not agree to the divorce. Mr. Keegan said it would mean going to court in order to have it done. I explained to him that Grandpa's wife already knows that. That is why she responded in writing. No one is willing to take this to court and she knows that. So Mr. Keegan stated that he would go talk to Grandpa on Monday at 10:00 AM.
Then I called Grandpa to let him know his attorney would come talk to him on Monday. Grandpa doesn't know what to do. Right now his wife is being very sweet and kind to him and he said he has nothing against her. I told him that his attorney would discuss why he might want a divorce and why he might want to stay married. Then Grandpa would have to make the decision.
Then he started talking about selling his trailer to Mary. I told him that was not going to happen, but he repeatedly said there is no reason not to. He told me Aunt T said she would sell it to Mary if she had the money. I told him that was not true. Aunt T will not sell to Mary, we had already discussed it. He said, " don't tell me what she said, I'll tell you what she said. She said if Mary had the money, she would sell the trailer to her!"
At one point, I asked him to stop yelling at me. He didn't think he was yelling, or arguing. Eventually he got me mixed up with Aunt T. I told him he was talking to Karen. He said "you need to tell me that, you two sound too much alike." I asked him if it made any difference who he was talking to and he said, "well, yeah it does!"
I tried to make small talk like asking what he was watching on TV. I asked if he and Mary were going out to dinner tonight and he said no, but they might on Saturday if it doesn't snow too much. Then we talked about how nice it was today.The conversation then returned to his marriage. He asked me what I wanted him to do, "get a divorce so you can have things your way?"
"What!?" We are at the same place we were the last time, Dad. You have to make the decision. No one can make you get a divorce, but if you want one, the attorney will make it happen."
Grandpa said that he doesn't understand how he ended up in the facility anyway. He said they should have let him go home. He stated the doctor won't let him out until he has someone the doctor will trust to take care of him. At least he understands that. But he doesn't understand why he wasn't allowed to go home to begin with. Which of course led to me stating that he doesn't eat a balanced breakfast, he doesn't eat a good lunch and he doesn't eat a good dinner. He is blind and can't do his own insulin and he can't hear well enough to respond to an emergency. To that he responded that he can hear, he is talking to me right now. "You just think I can't hear. You have thought that ever since I got my hearing aids." (I do not know what he was referring to, he got them when I was at college)
After another attempt at small talk, he made a comment which was obviously to another person; at which time I heard his wife respond. I asked Grandpa if she was just getting there or if she had been there all along.
"She's been hear all along." After that he quickly ended the phone call and hung up! Of course I fall apart.
I immediately called him back and asked why he hung up so quickly without saying I love you.
"What! don't you know I love you? I tell you that all the time!"
"No, you don't Dad. Especially if your wife is with you!"
"mumble mumble mumble..."
"Dad, I just called you back to let you know that I love you and I will talk to you later."
So now I am back in that space where it is dark and lonely. Brian has ballgames tonight, tomorrow and Saturday. My head is pounding and I feel sick to my stomach. I want out of this mess. I don't want to be here, but if I refuse the power of attorney Grandpa's wife will be able to do whatever she wants with him--and that includes abandoning him again.
I think that maybe you should write about something happy now... like ponnies and rainbows!!! :D it's been a while since you have written anything good.
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