Dr.

Well, I met with Dr. last Friday. He recognized me but did not have my story straight--he thought I was a former client who was in a car accident. I explained what my situation was and what has been happening. He wanted to know why I came to see him. I told him that it was my idea, that I need a refresher course because I am forgetting something, and that I picked up a new book and wanted his help to work through it.

It was a good visit and I was pretty confident through the process. When Dr. talked about some of the changes that have been made in treatment of panic disorder since 2002, he began to discuss a topic that is in the book I am working through.

Since my attacks do not happen in specific places, and seem to occur 'out of the blue', we will need to work on symptom exposure as opposed to situational exposure treatments. He proceded to talk about some of his other patients and what their specific symptom was. One client discovered he was uncomfortable when he sweats and he would become very worried that others would notice how much he was sweating, which would send him into a panic. Dr gave other examples and each time he talked about someone's symptom, I could feel the adrenaline rise in myself.

I laughed at him and said, "what I am hearing is that you want to make me panic so I won't be afraid to panic anymore."

He said, "yea, something like that."

"But the whole reason I'm here is because I don't want to panic!"

Dr. assured me that we would go as slow as necessary and I would not have to do anything I did not feel comfortable doing. But even reading about this type of treatment causes anxiety. I am determined to move forward though.